It’s never too late.
We have all asked the question at some point, “When do I finally get to live a life of choice?”—you know, the life where we get to do what we want. Spoiler alert: It’s apparently not when you turn 18, graduate college, or even when you land that first job. Nope, adulthood comes with a long list of responsibilities, and instead of choices, we get a schedule full of meetings, bills, and societal expectations. So, let’s explore when exactly we’ll all be free to live this elusive “life of choice”—and whether that’s just a myth we tell ourselves to keep going.
1. When You Define Success on Your Own Terms
Yes, the good old societal checklist for success: graduate, get a job, get married, have 2 kids, and retire (all while smiling through the grind). But, let’s be honest—does this really sound like the life you chose? Or is it just the “one-size-fits-all” template handed to us by society?
A life of choice starts the moment you realize success doesn’t have to look like a LinkedIn post. Maybe your version of success involves working a 4-day week, spending time binge-watching your favorite shows, or—gasp—saying no to overworking. What a concept, right? Who knew that “success” could be as simple as enjoying your day-to-day life, instead of pretending to love the rat race?
Next time someone asks about your five-year plan, just tell them you are planning to master the art of napping. It’s a valid life goal.
2. When You Learn to Say No (Without the Guilt)
The inability to say no is basically a trap. Somehow, society decided that being a people-pleaser is a virtue, and now we are all out here drowning in commitments we didn’t even want. Saying no? That’s like a rebellious act at this point.
A life of choice means learning to say no without apologizing or giving a 10-minute explanation. Because guess what? You don’t owe anyone a justification for wanting to binge Netflix instead of attending yet another Zoom happy hour.
Practice saying, “Sorry, I can’t make it,” and then don’t add a reason. Watch how the world doesn’t collapse around you. Magical, isn’t it?
3. When You Prioritize Joy Over Duty
Let’s talk about joy, shall we? That elusive feeling we’re supposed to have during the three hours of free time we get every weekend. We spend so much time running around completing “duties” that we forget joy is even an option.
Imagine living a life where joy wasn’t something you had to squeeze in between chores. Prioritizing joy over duty is radical in today’s world. Why fold laundry when you can nap? Why attend a meeting that could’ve been an email when you can stroll outside? Spoiler: Your duties will still be there later—don’t worry, they won’t run away.
Start putting “have fun” at the top of your to-do list. If anyone questions it, just tell them it’s for your “mental health.” They can’t argue with that.
4. When You Stop Playing the Comparison Game
Comparison—the thief of joy and the thing that makes us think everyone else is living their best life while we’re stuck in traffic. Social media is basically a highlight reel of other people’s curated lives, designed to make us feel like we’re failing.
Living a life of choice means opting out of the comparison trap. Guess what? Your former classmate’s “amazing” vacation probably came with a credit card bill they’ll be paying off for the next decade. So maybe stop feeling bad about your weekend at home, and instead, enjoy it with the smug knowledge that you’ll actually be sleeping soundly without debt nightmares.
Next time you see a picture-perfect Instagram post, just remember: filters, debt, and carefully hidden chaos. You’re doing just fine.
5. When You Let Go of Fear (Or At Least Fake It)
If fear weren’t holding us back, we would all probably be living in treehouses, working three hours a day, and pursuing our wildest dreams. But no, instead, we let fear of failure, rejection, and societal judgment dictate our choices.
Living a life of choice means saying “meh” to fear and going for what you want anyway. It’s not that you’ll magically stop being scared; you’ll just learn to do things despite it. Plus, what’s the worst that could happen? You’ll fail? Yeah, join the club.
Make failure your best friend. The more you mess up, the better stories you’ll have at dinner parties. At least that’s a win.
6. When You Stop Waiting for Permission
Here’s the kicker: you don’t actually have to wait for anyone to tell you it’s okay to live your life on your own terms. Shocking, I know. Society didn’t give you the memo, but you are allowed to make choices now—yes, even if your inbox is overflowing and your laundry is piling up.
Living a life of choice isn’t some grand moment in the future when everything magically aligns. It’s about choosing—right now—how you respond to the chaos. Will you let it run your life, or will you choose a path that actually makes you happy? The ball is in your court.
Go ahead and schedule that spontaneous “life of choice” moment for next Tuesday at 3 pm. Just kidding. Do it now. You don’t need a calendar invite.
You’re Already Living It (If You Want To)
You can live a life of choice right now—if you stop waiting for permission, stop chasing society’s definition of success, and start saying no to everything that doesn’t serve you. There’s no magical age or moment when someone’s going to hand you the keys to the life you want. You have them already.
So go ahead, choose your happiness over obligations, joy over duty, and your own definition of success over anyone else’s. And if that means lounging in your pajamas all weekend instead of conquering your to-do list? Well, that’s your choice.